Ephemera

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Lucille was secretly thrilled

I accidentally dug up this weird scratch pad that I bought at a garage sale, maybe thirty years ago? for ten cents. It has maybe 200 pages, each with a different drawing at the bottom or top, from the twisted mind of B. Kliban

Had a lot of trouble googling the artist because I thought the drawings were signed “BK Wilson” – I mean look at it… How do you get to “Kliban” from there? Finally I googled “Scott laughed hard when Wanda brought home the contaminated cheese” and that got me where I wanted to go.

Mr. Kliban died at 55, way too young. I recognize some of his cat themed work, but his book on cartooning, and a compilation from his work at Playboy magazine, these go for $35 and up on eBaY. Not that I would part with it if I had it.

Fun facts to know and tell

There is something wrong with this, but I can’t quite put my finger on it. Apparently pigs used to brush their teeth with their own hair? The “photomicrographs” make me want a hog bristle toothbrush, it looks like it would get between teeth better than rounded plastic bristles.

Ma pig is just set in her ways.

Overtime at the Lumber Mill

I was rooting around for something and found these old paystubs, and an electric bill, from 1943. Looks like they took out about 14% for taxes; I thought taxes were lower back then… Maybe making a whole $1.07 an hour bumped you into a higher bracket? Doesn’t sound like a lot, but his electric bill from a few years previous was only a buck eighty. That’s for 52 killowatt hours. Google says the average household today uses well over 1000 KWH a month. Where is it all going?

Also note the insurance deduction. It’s just for if you are hospitalized. I guess you paid the doc for office visits (Or house calls!) out of pocket, or gave him some chickens? or a bushel of corn?

Hippie cigar box! Groovy

Apparently some hippie took some newspaper articles and this deceptive invitation, and Mod-podged the hell out of this wooden cigar box.

You have to wonder if some Nixon supporters got all excited to read “You are cordially invited to attend the inauguration of Richard Milhous Nixon…” only to find that it’s just a come-on to round up some college students, pacifists, mothers of draftees, hardcore leftists, recreational protesters, and assorted filthy hippies. I don’t think it was too cordial either.

But what do I know? I was 8. Riding around on my Schwinn with the banana seat, getting my bell-bottoms caught in the chain. (I don’t know what happened to my chain guard)

Be your own boss! Help people avoid butt splinters!

At first glance, I thought this old magazine ad was suggesting that I should start a career in the exciting world of toilet seat repair. Back then, toilet seats were made of wood, and many were outdoors, so maybe they didn’t hold up as well as today’s plastic or lucite seats.

Still, people were self-sufficient, and could get this stuff in Mount Pilot, or just order it from the Sears catalog. I mean, it’s RIGHT THERE. Unless that page is missing.

Street Robbery!

I have an old “Fun with Tom and Betty” primer, it is not as valuable or popular as Dick and Jane. I can kind of see why, at least in the Dick and Jane books, you didn’t have to see a picture of your dad getting robbed on the street by a guy who claims he has a gun in his pocket, and his friend is in on it too.

Everything old is new again

I am not a pharmacist, but I think 3 grains is a lot. Then again, people didn’t usually visit the drugstore for a mere headache 100+ years ago, unless it was caused by a bullet crease or an axeident. (What they called an ax accident)

Worst. Party. Ever.

I was thinking about surprising my wife with a birthday party this year. Our living room is not configured to have people hiding behind the sofa. I found this handy party game book for up to 20 guests to play, with three fun games inside!
Here’s the first game, think up the longest name for each letter on the chart. Seems more like a baby shower game to me, but whatever.

I wasn’t expecting to take the SAT exam at your party.

This game is more of a pop quiz from fifth grade history, but the booze is free here. I can answer most of these. It helps if George Gobel from the old Hollywood Squares show is haunting your house.


Wait, what is this? No, you can’t use Google. Leaving so soon? The party is just starting! We haven’t even played “Twister” yet!

Our neighbors, Tarzan and Francis the Talking Mule

Library card from "Our American Neighbors"

Here’s an old textbook from a yard sale. It’s sort of reassuring that previous generations also knew how to annoy the librarians.

I think all the entries after Nyla Sperlick and before Tom Ranken are the same kid, a kid who lived in a house with a television I presume… He checked out the book for “Dragnet” in 1954, then “Francis”, I presume he means the talking mule, as his address is “Stall 3 1/2” (Adding the fraction makes it funnier- this kid is a comedy genius).

Who knows why the date is 1868 on that one. Then back to 600 B.C. for Tarzan at cave 6D ( Picture a cave apartment – maybe Tarzan will bring Jane up to show her his etchings! ) Then five years later, Tarzan checks out this book again, but now he’s moved to “Cave 91”.

We can only hope that this kid got into advertising or some such lucrative endeavor, rather than getting electroshock therapy.

Now all you need is some Hi Karate

MB-Gem-Razor-Stubble1 Had to get this matchbook at a street sale, after embarrassing myself by letting a lecherous HEHEHEHE laugh escape while reading the comic. Very curious about this GEM razor with “guiding eye”… Not sure I want it watching me shave though.